Turning to God - Reclaiming Christian Conversion as Unique, Necessary and Supernatural

 Greetings All,

This week's 'thought' has to do with conversion. That is, what many think it is, as opposed to what the Bible assures us it is.  It comes from David Wells superb book, "Turning to God - Reclaiming Christian Conversion as Unique, Necessary and Supernatural." It is well worth the read for any earnest Gospel-sharing Christian.
     This selection speaks for itself.  Enjoy.

     "Conversion rests upon Christ, is grounded in him, looks to him, is supernaturally caused, and has eternal results... This truth has sometimes been inadvertently obscured in the evangelical world... If Christianity is true, and if conversion is a part of its message, then those who have turned to Christ will have a story to tell. They will have experienced God's forgiveness of sins. They will know what it is to return in the rags and tatters of human depravity, with no right to a place in God's house, and find the embrace of God. They will know what it is to be accepted by the Father, whose arms are opened wide, to be clothed in fine robes, and to take their seat at a welcoming banquet. They will experience the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit and will receive assurance of their salvation. If Christian faith is true -- and it is -- there will be experience of which we can speak.

     Nevertheless, we are not testifying to our own selves, as if our own personal biography had a compelling claim to everyone's attention. No, we are testifying to Christ! That, at least, is what witness-bearing in the New Testament is like. There, the focus is on the objective reality of God's redemptive work. It is to that reality, not to themselves, that early believers pointed. And this is what is unique; our experience is not...

     The truth of the gospel is not tied to our testimony to it. It is tied to what God did in Christ in reconciling us to himself. Therefore, while we can and should speak about our experience of this, that speaking needs to come in the framework that is also apologetic and draws people not to ourselves as those who are forgiven, but to Christ through whom forgiveness is found.

     Additionally, the widespread use of testimony, perhaps as a habit passed on from the revivals, has had the unintended consequence of placing an emphasis on conversion that the New Testament does not have... Conversion is only the threshold to the building of salvation. We are not called to stand, year in and year out, gazing at the threshold and testifying to it, but enter the building. Conversion does not stand alone; it is the beginning of a lifelong journey of growing in Christ and being conformed to his image. Discipleship must follow on conversion as living and breathing follow on birth. There is no life without birth and there is no Christian faith without regeneration (supernaturally being made alive in Christ) and conversion (turning in faith away from sin to follow Jesus).

     In the Christian world today, however, what we have all too often is an aberration -- spiritual birth that is not followed by an obvious spiritual life. And that is what has produced considerable in-authenticity at the very moment when, in Western cultures, people are searching for what is genuine. They are looking for what is real a midst the hype and marketing frauds of modernity.

     Outside the context of personal authenticity, testimonies about being converted do far more harm than good... Just as there is no discipleship without conversion, so there also can be no conversion without discipleship. The two belong together. That, at least, should be our insistence. And if we fail here, our testimonies to God's grace in our conversion become empty, discordant, and unbelievable." 

     It doesn't take long (going through the gospels) to see that Jesus call was, "follow me," or "leave everything and follow me." It was a call to discipleship and the issue of conversion (turning from how they were living to a life of following Jesus) was thrust upon them simply by considering the cost of becoming a disciple. Shall I or shall I not?

     Likewise, from the practice of many in the Church in recent years you would think Jesus had simply asked us to preach the Gospel of forgiveness and solicit "decisions" for Him, or a show of hands, and that the Great Commission is simply a call to make "converts."

     Yet we know that's not true. The call of the Great Commission is to make disciples -- disciples who have been taught everything He has commanded us (Matthew 28:20). Better yet, disciples who are trained to go out and become disciple-makers themselves.

     The call is, "Go therefore and make disciples of every nation (ethne = people group)..."  What a daunting task!  And one that still carries the same sense of urgency as the day Jesus gave it.

In the Bonds of Christian Charity, Pastor Jeff

Fear

Greetings All,

     Today's 'thought' goes out to those who may be wrestling with fear.  Fear of inadequacy, fear of failure, fear of being vulnerable, and even the common fear of those in ministry -- the fear of letting God down or not doing things in a fashion worthy of His glory (as inappropriate as such thinking can in many cases be).

     This excerpt comes from Sheila Walsh and is found in the little gem of a book entitled, "The Desert Experience."

     







In it she is extremely open, honest, and transparent. And as is typical of her writings, they are saturated with grace-filled insights. I offer it to any who might be dealing with a fear of their own profound sense of inadequacy. Enjoy.

     "All I know is that I was slowly dying inside. I was lonely.  I was afraid. I was unbearably sad. What added to my hopelessness was the fact that I had no idea what was wrong with me. I loved God. I enjoyed serving Him. I believed He loved me.
     Some nights I would drive out of the gates of CBN and turn my car toward the ocean. I would park at the far end of the beach and get out and walk and walk for miles. I remember sitting on a sand dune, gripping my knees to my chest and groaning from a place too deep inside for me to understand. I decided that I was losing my mind.

     My father had died in his thirties in a bleak psychiatric hospital in Scotland. The legacy seemed to be imprinted on my soul, "Like father, like daughter."

     I remember sitting in Pat Robertson's office asking for a leave of absence, telling him that I had been accepted as a patient in a psychiatric unit in a hospital in Washington, D.C.  I was filled with the shame that is particular to those who struggle with mental illness...

     My greatest fear growing up was that I would end up in a place like my father. What I did not know then was that God had planned to deliver me from myself in the ruins of my life. I did not understand then that some of God's most precious gifts come in boxes that make your hands bleed when you open them. Inside is what you have been longing for all your life. Only His love could do that. Only God would do that. Only His love is as fierce and relentless as our deepest pain, our unspoken fears. We become accustomed to simply surviving. God wants more...

     There are doors in our lives we have locked so tight, we are convinced that if we were to open them we would be consumed by what is inside. We would be left alone. But that's the whole, glorious point: We are not alone. I discovered that on that rainy night in October of 1992 when I checked into the hospital. I thought I checked in alone. I wanted to check in alone. But Christ checked in with me. He sat with me, all night, on the floor....

     As the days turned into a week, then two weeks, what I discovered was a group of people very much like myself. They were people who loved God but didn't have all the answers. They were people who were struggling to come to terms with their humanity lived out in imperfect obedience. A pastor who had nothing left to say to his people. A teacher who had lost hope in the future, whose futility had rendered her impotent to give anything at all to her students.  A young girl whose only perceived area of control was to starve herself; the success of her rebellion was killing her. And me... as deep as the marrow of my bones I felt unloved and unlovable... Was I so afraid of my 'not good enoughness' that I kept God's perfect love standing as the front door? It would have been easier if I'd had some terrible sin to confess, what we consider with our skewed human sight to be one of the 'big ones.' But all I had was me and a sense that I was not enough.

     And I was right.

     That was the bad news and the good news rolled into one spectacular gift. I wasn't enough. Even in all my supposed best moments I wasn't enough and never would be. But that's the point. Christ is enough. He loved me completely, shadows and all.

     That hit me one morning as I sat with several of the patients and nurses in a small church. It wasn't a remarkable service or a particularly new sermon topic, but I was raw and open; my defenses were down. And deep in my soul I heard and I believed: 'You are loved. You are loved. You are loved.' I wept the exhausted tears of one who had been wandering alone in the desert for years and finally catches sight of the way home. There was no quick fix or dramatic rescue, just the relief of finding Christ, the Way...

     I had based most of my Christian life on all the things I could do for God. Now I had nothing. I was empty-handed. I was like a newborn child learning how to live. I was living a divine paradox. I had never felt less worthy and yet more loved. I had never been so disenfranchised yet more welcomed by the Father. I began to realize I had spent most of my life trying to make God glad He chose me. I had run myself into the ground because I wanted to be invaluable. Now there was nothing good left to say about myself, and even if there had been I was too tired to say it.

     There seems to be something that the desert experience alone can gift us with. Perhaps it's because there are no distractions. Perhaps it's the very aloneness, the silence, that makes us finally listen to all the rumblings in our souls. Now I think 'How kind of God to let all my greatest fears happen rather than simply to remove them.' I longed for a rescue; He gave me a relationship. I wanted deliverance; He gave me companionship in the ruins. If He had simply removed my fears I would have lived the rest of my life dreading their return. To let them happen and sit with me, bloodied and bruised, was the most precious gift of love...

     A girl was sitting on a bus reading [a book which included a chapter on grace]. The man beside her asked: 'What's grace.'  'I don't know. I haven't gotten that far.'  That was me. I knew it was in the book, I just hadn't gotten to it yet. Grace is impossible to grasp outside of the framework of the love of God. It makes no sense. It's as Lewis Smedes described in his book 'Shame and Grace' -- 'The gift of being declared worthy before we become worthy.'  What a gift, but how contrary to how we live our lives in this world, in the church, where proving yourself is everything. 

     At the moment I began to grasp hold of grace, I was as the prodigal son with his well-rehearsed speech drowned out by the love of his father. There is no quid pro quo with God. We have nothing to give, nothing to barter with. He has and is everything. I now believe that God delights to use those of us who have had our hearts and wills broken in the desert... The desert leaves you with the absolute conviction that there is nothing you can do to make God love you and nothing you can do to negate that love. You are left with the liberating awareness that all we are in our best moments are earthen vessels to contain the grace and glory of God."

     She shares much more, and its all very good and helpful, but if you desire to read that you will need to pick up a copy of the book, which also includes stories by other well-known Christians who have gone through difficult times in the 'desert' (J. I. Packer, John Trent, Charles Stanley, John Maxwell, Jill Briscoe, etc.).

     I will end with one last quote from Shelia that I also have found true in ministry. It is worth much consideration in itself: "The amazing thing was that my brokenness was far greater bridge to others than my apparent wholeness had ever been." How true. How true. 

In the Grip of His Grace, Pastor Jeff

Total Forgiveness

Greetings All,

     This week's 'thought' has to do with forgiveness - total forgiveness. In fact, that's the title of the book it is taken from: "Total Forgiveness" by R. T. Kendall. He is the pastor who took over at London's Westminster Chapel after Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones passed.
     There are few things more important to our ongoing spiritual health and growth than obedience to Jesus command to forgive (Matt. 6:14-15 / 18:21-35). That's why He places such a heavy stress on it. There is little that will poison the soul more than the root of bitterness that finds its source in our refusal to forgive -- and all the more when we fertilize it by convincing ourselves it's ok if we don't.
     The root of bitterness we often permit to grow (because it gives us a sense of power over the perpetrator) will choke out our ability to love, experience joy, have inner peace and rest of soul, pray with a clear conscience before God, or come to God with confidence, and so forth.

     In this sense Kendall's book is a good read for most and a must read for some. This section is on forgiveness as an "Inner Condition of the Heart."  Enjoy.

     "Total forgiveness must take place in the heart or it is worthless, for 'out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks' (Matt. 12:34). If we have not truly forgiven those who hurt us in our hearts, it will come out -- sooner or later.  But if it has indeed taken place in the heart, our words will show it. When there is bitterness, it will eventually manifest itself; when there is love, 'there is nothing in (that person) to make him stumble' (I John 2:10).

     This is why reconciliation is not essential for total forgiveness. If forgiveness truly takes place in the heart, one does not need to know whether one's enemy will reconcile. If I have forgiven him in my heart of hearts, but he still doesn't speak to me, I can still have inner victory. It may be far easier to forgive when we know that those who maligned or betrayed us are sorry for what they did, but if I must have this knowledge before I can forgive, I may never have the victory over bitterness. Those who believe that they are not required to forgive unless their offender has first repented are not following Jesus example on the cross.

Jesus said, 'Father forgive them, for they

            do not know what they are doing.' And

            they divided up his clothes by casting lots.'

                                                      Luke 23:34

     If Jesus had waited until His enemies felt some guilt or shame for their words and actions, He would never have forgiven them.

     It is my experience that most people we must forgive do not believe they have done anything wrong at all, or if they know that they did something wrong, they believe it was justified. I would even go as far as to say that at least 90 percent of all the people I've ever had to forgive would be indignant at the thought that they had done something wrong. If you gave them a lie-detector test, they would honestly say that they had done nothing wrong -- and they would pass with flying colors.

     Total forgiveness, therefore, must take place in the heart. If I have a genuine heart experience, I will not be devastated if there is no reconciliation. If those who hurt me don't want to continue a relationship with me, it isn't my problem, because I have forgiven them. This is also why a person can achieve inner peace even when forgiving someone who has died. The apostle John wrote, 'Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God' (I John 3:21).

     Confidence toward God is ultimately what total forgiveness is all about; He is the One I want to please at the end of the day. He cares and knows whether I have truly and totally forgiven, and when I know I have His love and approval, I am one very happy and contented servant of Christ... Relinquishing bitterness (an excessive desire for vengeance that comes from deep resentment, and heads up the list of things that grieve the Spirit of God - Eph. 4:30ff) is an open invitation for the Holy Spirit to give you His peace, His joy, and the knowledge of His will... How can we be sure there is no bitterness in our hearts? Bitterness is gone when there is no desire to get even with or punish the offender, when I do or say nothing that would hurt his reputation or future, and when I truly wish him well in all he seeks to do."

     Hard?  Yes. It goes without saying -- especially when it has to do with such things as rape, incest, abuse, betrayal, or having been used and then tossed aside like a worthless toy -- and even more so for a parent when it happens to one of our children. In such cases there is probably no more difficult thing in this world to do than to forgive -- truly and totally forgive. 

     Yet it must be done. Not so much for the perpetrator (who may never repent or admit wrongdoing) but for us, our conscience, and the sake of our relational intimacy with God. For at its root, all bitterness involves some degree of bitterness toward the all-knowing, all-powerful, sovereign God who could have prevented our pain but chose not (another section he deals with is the need to forgive God, odd as that may sound).

     As one person once put it, "Refusing to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." It only hurts us.  Therefore, as hard as some cases of forgiveness are (and some will drive the victim to the brink) -- since it is commanded by God, He will give us the grace to do it. As with all things in the Christian life, God doesn't ask us to do it alone in our own strength and power. He offers His grace to empower and enable us -- the only thing that makes true and total heart-forgiveness possible in many cases.

In His Service, Pastor Jeff