God Has United You to Himself

Greetings All!

     Today's "thought"  comes to you from one of the first authors I ever read after being converted - Andrew Murray.   In 1980 I was in Marion, Indiana, training to go to the Dominican Republic to work with teens through 'New Horizons Youth Ministries.'  I had just come to Christ months earlier and had no books to help me grow in the faith once I arrived there.  And since my "salary" was a dollar a day (and that's not an  exaggeration!), I had very little cash.  Therefore, I did the only thing I could - I prayed for $50.00 that I might be able to purchase some books to take with me to help me grow.  Three days later a check came in the mail for $55.00(!), which I then took and spent on books -- and all but one was by Andrew Murray.  ("Absolute Surrender," "Like Christ," "Abide in Christ," "With Andrew Murray in the School of Prayer," "Waiting on God," and "Humility."  I still have each one!  The other was, "Love Life of the Lord" by A. B. Simpson.)

     










     Today's excerpt comes from an updated version of "Abide in Christ" published by the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, and entitled, "Abiding in Christ."  This selection is the entry for Day 6: "God Has United You to Himself." I trust it will instruct and enrich your soul. Enjoy!

     "'You are in Christ Jesus.' The believers at Corinth were still weak and carnal, only babes in Christ. And yet Paul wanted them, at the outset of his teaching, to know distinctly that they were in Christ Jesus. The whole Christian life depends on the clear consciousness of our position in Christ.  Most essential to abiding in Christ is the daily renewal of our faith's assurance, "I am in Christ Jesus." All fruitful preaching to believers must begin with: "You are in Christ Jesus." 

     But the apostle has an additional thought of almost greater importance: It is because of God that you are in Christ Jesus" (I Cor. 1:30).  Paul would have us not only remember our union with Christ, but also - and more particularly - that it is not of our own doing, but the work of God Himself.  As the Holy Spirit teaches us to realize this we will see what a source of assurance and strength this is to us. If it is of God alone that I am in Christ, then God Himself, the infinite One, becomes my security for all I need or desire in seeking to abide in Christ. 

     Let me try to explain what this means...  So often, when the believer tries to say, "I am in Christ Jesus," he looks more to the work he has done than to that wondrous secret work of God which united him to Christ. This is to be expected at the beginning of the Christian course.  "I know that I have believed," is a valid testimony.  But it is important that the mind be led to see that at the back of our turning, believing, and receiving Christ, God's almighty power was doing its work of inspiring our will, taking possession of us [raising us from our death in trespasses and sins -- Ephesians 2:1, 2:5, and Colossians 2:13] and carrying out its own purpose of love in planting us into Christ Jesus.

     As the believer understands the the divine side of the work of salvation, he will learn to praise and worship with new enthusiasm and to rejoice more than ever in his salvation. At each step he reviews, the song will come: "This is the Lord's doing."  It is Divine Omnipotence working out what Eternal Love devised. "It is because of God that I am in Christ Jesus." The words will lead him even further and higher, and to the very depths of eternity: "And those he predestined he also called" (Romans 8:30).  One's calling in time is the manifestation of God's purpose in eternity.  For before the world came into existence, God had his sovereign love fixed on you in the election of grace and had chosen you in Christ.

     That you know you are in Christ is the key to understanding the full meaning of this word: "Because of God I am in Christ Jesus."  With the prophet your language will be, "The Lord has appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love, I have drawn you with loving-kindness'" (Jeremiah 31:3). You will see your own salvation as a part of that "mystery of His will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ (Ephesians 1:9), and you will join with the whole church as they say, "In him we were chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will" (Ephesians 1:11).  Nothing will exalt free grace more, and make man bow very low before it, than this knowledge of the mystery of God's will: "It is because of God that we are in Christ Jesus."

     Given the fickle nature of humanity, plagued as it is by sin, it is so comforting and soul-strengthening to know, "It is because of God that I am in Christ Jesus."   It humbles, melts the heart, and brings joy unspeakable to the believer's soul to think that his or her salvation is the outworking in time of God's good pleasure and purpose for them from before the foundation of the world (Ephesians 1:4-5).

     One of my favorite hymns - “Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing” - expresses so well our indebtedness to God for this grace. An indebtedness that isn't simply for his grace in joining us to Christ initially, as Murray speaks of above, but for holding us in it's grip when our hearts have wanted to wander, stray, and go their own way -- even after receiving such free and unmerited grace.

     "Oh, to grace how great a debtor, Daily I'm constrained to be

      Let that goodness like a fetter (like a shackle around my ankle), Bind my wandering heart to Thee.

      Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, Prone to leave the God I love;

      Here's my heart, oh, take and seal it, Seal it for Thy courts above."

     If it were up to me, and me alone, I know all too well where I would be.  Right where I was when in time He called me - dead in my trespasses and sins.  Murray is right: "As the Holy Spirit teaches us to realize this we will see what a source of assurance and strength this is to us. If it is of God alone that I am in Christ, then God Himself, the infinite One, becomes my security for all I need or desire in seeking to abide in Christ...  As the believer understands the the divine side of the work of salvation, he will learn to praise and worship with new enthusiasm and to rejoice more than ever in his salvation. At each step he reviews, the song will come: "This is the Lord's doing." It is Divine Omnipotence working out what Eternal Love devised."

In the Service of His Grace, Pastor Jeff

Simply Sacred

Greetings All!

This week's "thought" comes to you from Gary Thomas, and is taken from his book, "Simply Sacred."

     As I was reading through the book, this particular entry caught my attention.  Why?  Because I can sometimes be disappointed at the way things are going in this world.  All it takes is glancing at the days headlines -- "Man kills another over parking spot dispute...,"  "Suicide bomber kills 13 and injures 24 at Baghdad ice cream shop..."  "Brother who drugs and rapes sister gets probation..."     The values, the priorities, the political rants, the greed, the language, the unreasonableness, the selfishness, the lack of respect, love and common sense... it can tend to bring one down.

     That's why I chose this entry.  It helps us look at all that from a different perspective.  A redemptive perspective. A perspective that reminds us that Jesus' call is for us as His followers to be salt and light (Matthew 5:13-16).  And what we sometimes forget is this: Salt is the most desired where the food is the most bland, and light is the most cherished when our surroundings are the darkest and our path littered with dangerous obstacles.

     Gary's entry for today reinforces this biblical idea, and in doing so helps turn our disillusionment with this world into a motivation to carry out Christ's mission for us. That of being salt and light. Enjoy.

Defiant Beauty

     "Years ago on a trip through southwestern Washington [state], I traveled through miles and miles of tree farms...  Interspersed among these tree farms were occasional stretches of clear-cut logging projects. The land looked devastated, broken, and abused. Even knowing that the land would come back after planting new trees, it's still a bit sad to see such brutal scarring of a forest.

     Yet, as I passed another clear-cut stretch, my eye caught something that almost made me pull off the road.  There, in a devastated patch of land, stood a startlingly beautiful maple tree, in full autumn colors. Somehow, the loggers had missed it.

     The contrast could not have been more stark -- or more beautiful. Beauty surrounded by beauty begins, after a time, to seem mediocre. But beauty in the midst of chaos or ugliness stuns us. It seizes our attention. In a barren and broken stretch of land, this tree captured my imagination and told another story. Had it stood in the midst of New Hampshire's White Mountains during autumn, it likely would have been missed -- one stunning tree in a forest of thousands of other stunning trees.  Here, however, in a broken, hurting land, this glorious tree proclaimed a transcendent truth.

     In the deepest part of us, we truly yearn for such "defiant beauty." In a world where people choose self-centered lives, where ugly things happen, where sin seems to spread unchecked, where daily assaults take their toll, we can point to the defiant beauty of a selfless life, seeking first the kingdom of God, putting others first, and even sacrificing (if need be) -- all to proclaim a transcendent truth much greater than ourselves.

     I invite you to develop this defiant beauty..., the kind that has shone through all generations of the church. At your office, in your house, at school, during walks through the malls, or visits to friends houses, let's carry the defiant beauty of our Savior's love and hope to a sin-stained world."

     The apostle Paul put forth this same truth in Romans 12:9-21; I Corinthians 13:1-13; II Corinthians 5:11-6:13; Galatians 5:16-26, and elsewhere.  There will always be things in the world that will tend to bring us down. Yet, it is in the face of all such things that we have the opportunity to add the most flavor, or shine most brightly.  Love in the face of hate, caring in the face or indifference, sacrifice in place of selfishness, generosity in the face of greed -- can not help but be noticed.

     Like that one, solitary, beautiful maple tree decked out in its autumn splendor, in the midst of a clear cut swath of destruction, we can make a difference. We can hide our light under a basket of self-protection, or lose our flavor by associating only with those who live and believe just like we do.  Or, we can do what Jesus called us to do and go out into the world, without being a part of the world, and seek to be His ambassadors of love and reconciliation.  Negative situations can discourage us, or they can be what Jesus and Paul both suggested they could be -- our renewed motivation for mission!  Determine that it may always be the latter, for Jesus sake.

Make it your goal today to be the light that shines into some dark situation, Pastor Jeff

What Path Do I Follow

Greetings Everyone!

     Today's "thought" took me back to the days just prior to, and shortly after becoming a follower of Jesus. I was 23 and could barely think of much other than Jesus -- who He was, what He had done, what His call on my life meant, and how obeying that call would change everything in my life.  I did lose friends.  One called me a "religious fanatic."  Others politely avoided me.  And, yes, I'm not faultless. I did suffer from earnest zeal without knowledge or the wisdom that comes from experience. It's not all that untypical for a person who finally discovers that Jesus is real and wants to make sure everyone else does too (mistakenly thinking it's totally up to them). Sometimes (I have to confess) I've wished I could go back in time and approach some people and situations a bit more wisely than I did, for in some cases I'm sure I did more harm than good to the cause of Christ.

Yet, in other ways I miss many aspects of that "first love" stage. That spiritual discovery stage where everything about the faith is so new and fresh!  A time when I was less "balanced,"  had not gotten into many of the burdensome or restricting routines and responsibilities of life, and was more of an adventurer and risk taker for Jesus.  Maybe some of you can remember that stage in your life.  And if it is merely a memory, with little of it remaining, maybe you need to ask what happened to make it fade?  Do you miss it?  Have you prayed for the Lord to restore it?  Have you followed Jesus' spiritual prescription for those who have "lost their first love"  where He says in Revelation 2:5: "Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent (for letting it happen), and do the things you did at first."   Consider this excerpt from Kyle Idleman's book, "Not a Fan," and see if you (like me) might not need to repent and seek a new portion of God's ever-fresh and spirit-renewing grace. Enjoy.

     "In Matthew 19 we find a man whose name we don't know.  We learn enough from the Gospels to know he is referred to as the "Rich Young Ruler." He's followed a path that has led to wealth and power. (That's the path most of us are trying to find.) He comes to Jesus with a question. In verse 16 he asks: "Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?"

    You have to give him credit for asking the right question. He wants to know how to get to heaven. But even the way he asks it reveals the heart of a fan [and not a follower]. He asks, what must "I do"?  That word could be translated "acquire" or "earn." He thinks it's going to be an impressive resume that will get him in. Eventually Jesus tells him what he must do. In verse 21 he says: "Sell all your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasures in heaven. Then come, follow me."  Jesus invites the man to become his follower, but first the man is told to sell all his possessions and give to the poor. He's faced with the choice of following Jesus or keeping his stuff, but he couldn't do both. There is no way to follow Jesus without denying himself. Many people want to make this story about money, but it's not as much about money as it is about following Jesus. Jesus puts this man at a crossroads. He can follow the path that leads to money, or he can follow Jesus; but he can't follow both.

     So what does this mean for you and me? Is selling everything a requirement to follow Jesus? Well, it may be. In fact, I would say the more defensive you are of Jesus' words to this man, the more likely it is that Jesus might be saying them to you.  What is true is that everyone who follows Jesus will find himself or herself at a similar crossroads as this man in Matthew 19.  You won't be able to take the path of following Jesus without walking away from a different path. He wanted to follow Jesus, but when forced to choose between Jesus and his stuff, he chose his stuff. He wouldn't deny himself.  What choice will you make? 

     A few years ago I was pretty deep into some tribal areas of Africa. One night I finished preaching a message to a crowd of a few dozen people. I presented the gospel and the invitation of Jesus to follow him.  There were two young men, probably in their twenties, who accepted Christ and committed to follow him. The following afternoon these two men showed up at the house where we were staying. They each carried a good sized bag over their shoulder. I went over and asked the local missionary we were staying with why they had come. He explained that these two men would no longer be welcomed by their families or in their village. When I heard that, I was afraid that maybe this was going to be more than they would be willing to go along with.  About that time the missionary said to me, "They knew this would happen when they made the decision."

     They were choosing Jesus over their families. They were choosing Jesus over their own comfort and convenience, and "fans" don't do that. Only true followers are willing to deny themselves and say, "I choose Jesus. I choose Jesus over my family. I choose Jesus over money. I choose Jesus over career goals. I am his completely. I choose Jesus over looking at porn. I choose Jesus over a redecorated house. I choose Jesus over my freedom.  I choose Jesus over what other people think of me."  A follower makes a decision every day to deny himself and choose Jesus, even if it costs everything. When we sacrificially deny ourselves for Christ's sake it is the clearest evidence of our committed love. A committed love is best demonstrated through sacrifice. When we deny ourselves for another person it communicates true love."

     In light of what he says each one of us must ask: "What path do I follow?  If love is shown by sacrifice and self-denial for the sake of another, do I show such a love for Jesus in my life?  Since I cannot follow two paths (or two Masters), when given the option between family, money, career goals, porn, freedom, a redecorated house, what people think of me, or Jesus, what do (or will) I choose?  What have I chosen in the past? Am I still just a fan, or have I become a follower? Do I admire Jesus from a distance, sitting in the stands and cheering, or have I walked down onto the field of play to become a true, committed, disciple?"   Read Revelation 2:1-7.  Do you remember the heights from which you have fallen?  Has the Holy Spirit convicted you with the need to repent?  Will you take Jesus at His word and return to, "doing the things you did at first"?

In His Service, Pastor Jeff

Amy Carmichael

Greetings All,

 This week's"thought" comes to you from the well-known missionary to India, Amy Carmichael (1867-1951).  And since her life-story is as inspiring as the thought I shall reference at the end, I would like to share a little about her life before I share the excerpt from her book, simply entitled: "If"
     It is less than 100 pages long and contains only one small thought or reflection on Christ's love on each page. The first is: "If I have not compassion on my fellow-servant, even as the Lord had pity on me, then I know nothing of Calvary love."  With much blank space left on each page, I have sometimes used that space to write further thoughts on her reflections of Christ's love. (Should you desire to read more of Amy's life, the book, "A Chance to Die," by Elizabeth Elliot, is a superb biographical account of her life and work.)  Enjoy.

Here is her fascinating story:
     Amy Carmichael was born in 1867 into a well-to-do North Ireland Christian family.  In her teen years, she was educated at a Wesleyan Methodist boarding school; and at age 13, while still in boarding school, she accepted Christ as Savior.  When she was age 18, her father died, leaving the family in difficult financial circumstances as he had given a large personal loan that was not repaid.  The family moved to Belfast.  There she became involved in visiting in the slums, and seeing the terrible conditions under which many women and girls worked in the factories, she began a ministry with these women.  It was a work based on faith in God alone, and He met the needs in most remarkable ways. She later developed a similar ministry in Manchester, with her mother at her side...

     In 1892, at the age of twenty-four, Amy received her "Macedonian Call" and went as a missionary to Japan.  But there she met with disappointments. The Japanese language seemed impossible to her, and the missionary community was not the picture of harmony she had envisioned.  Likewise, her health was also a problem.  After 15 months as a missionary, Amy became convinced that Japan was not where God wanted her...

     She arrived in Madras in November of 1895, a discouraged, confused, and ill young Irish woman.  She was 28 years old.  Soon after her arrival, she contracted Dengue Fever, which laid her low for a period of time.  She was sent to a more healthful place to recuperate.  In that community she saw that the church was very "active" but there were no changed lives.  She detested the meetings with the other missionary ladies -- drinking tea and gossiping and showing very little concern for the eternal souls of those about them. She felt so alone.

     The following lines are so appropriate concerning the missionary community in Bangalore:

Onward Christian soldiers,

Sitting on the mats;

Nice and warm and cozy

 Like little pussycats...

     Amy just did not fit into the stiff, staid, missionary community of Bangalore and subsequently went to the very south end of India to live with another missionary family.  The Walkers were a godly family that really understood the Hindu religion and the tremendous need of reaching out...  For several years Amy, along with a daughter of the Walkers and several Christian Indian ladies, began an itinerant ministry through the villages in the south tip of India.  They were dubbed the "starry cluster," for the Indians recognized the sincerity and light that shown forth from them.  The members of the band had no salary, simply looking to God to supply their needs.  Their attitude was "How much can I do without that I may have more to give?"  It was during this period of time that she took on the habit of wearing Indian dress, which she continued throughout her lifetime.

     A life-changing experience took place in 1901.  A little five-year-old girl, named "Pearl Eyes" by Amy, was brought to her by an Indian woman.  The child had been sold by the mother to the temple and there was being prepared and taught all the degradation of temple prostitution. Twice she had run away only to be caught, carried back, beaten, and subjected to the terrible perversion of that Hindu temple.
     Finally, as she was running away again at night, she met with this understanding woman who brought her to Amy.  Amy gathered the little child up into her lap and picked up a rag doll and gave it to the child to play with.  It was then that she truly understood the evil of the temple practice.  Little Pearl Eyes talked freely as she played with the doll.  She told Amy things that they did to her in the temple, demonstrating them using the doll.  The date was March 7, 1901.  Amy never forgot that day nor the child's story.  It was terrible beyond imagination.  This was the beginning of her rescue of these children who had been dedicated to the temple gods.

     This incident led to the founding of the Dohnavur Fellowship.  Over the years literally thousands of temple children have been rescued and other ministries established there at the Dohnavur Fellowship in South India.  In 1918, they began to rescue baby boys, for they likewise were dedicated to the temple gods and goddesses.  Other areas of the work over the years were added such as hospital, schools, printing, etc.  Amy was not understood by many of the missionaries in India.  She was also greatly resented by the Hindu priests and was frequently taken to court on charges of being a kidnapper.
     Amy was greatly influenced by the life of George Mueller and ordered her work on the same basis, never asking for financial help except as she winged her petitions to the God of all grace.  In 1931 (at 64 years of age) Amy had a fall that left her an invalid for the remainder of her life, and she seldom left her bed.  It was during this period of her life that she was most prolific in writing -- the profits of which were used to help fund the work.  Occasionally someone would wheel her in a type of wheelchair out onto a veranda where her children would gather outside and greet her and sing to her.
     It's interesting that most of the children who are there do not know their birth dates, so they reckon on the day they arrived at the Dohnavur home, and call it the "coming day." That becomes their birthday. On the coming day there is a special occasion with special treats and new clothing; and they honor the individual in some way.
     Temple prostitution played a major part of Hinduism. This practice was known by the British who governed India and had been spoken against, but nothing ever happened. However, through the "campaigning" of Amy and some other concerned people, temple prostitution was banned toward the end of Amy's life. From the time Amy set foot on Indian soil to the day she died in 1951, she never returned to her homeland.  She went 55 years without a furlough, passing away at 84 years of age.  Somewhere, in an unmarked tomb on the compound at Dohnavur, Amy was buried.  She didn't want a marker placed over her grave.  She simply wanted to remain a part of the Dohnavur Fellowship she had started.

     Amy's thought from her book "If," which in many ways describes how she continued on in her ministry, is as follows:

     "Sometimes when we are distressed by past failure, and tormented by fear of failure in the future, we should again set our faces toward Jerusalem. Nothing helps so much as to give some familiar Scripture time to enter into us and become part of our being. The words "grace for grace" have been a help to me since I read in a little book by Bishop Moule something that opened their meaning. (Till then I had not understood them.)

     He says: The word "for" means "instead."  "The image is of a perpetual succession of supply; a displacement ever going on... The picture before us is as of a river. Stand on the banks and contemplate the flow of waters.  A minute passes, and another.  Is it the same stream still?  Yes.  But is it the same water?  No. The liquid mass that passed you a few seconds ago fills now another section of the channel. New water has displaced it, or if you please, replaced it -- water for water, or water instead of water.  And so hour by hour, and year by year, and century by century, the process holds; one stream, other waters -- living, not stagnant, because always in the great identity there is perpetual exchange. Grace takes the place of grace [and love takes the place of love]; ever new, ever old, ever the same, ever fresh and young. Old grace, new grace, hour by hour, year by year, through Christ."

     "Grace for grace."  Same God, same inexhaustible Source, same infinite flow of undeserved favor, yet ever fresh supplies of grace for every situation.  Our God is an infinite and inexhaustible supply of fresh, cool, springs of living water, always ready to refresh, renew, empower and restore. "To Him who is able to do exceedingly more than all we can ask or imagine, according to His power at work in us, to Him be glory in the church, and in Christ Jesus, throughout all generations, for ever and ever!  Amen" (Ephesians 3:20-21).  In His Service, Pastor Jeff

God's Little Lessons on Life for Dad

Greetings All,

     This weeks "thought" comes to you from a book I picked up at a yard sale a few weeks back. It's called, "God's Little Lessons on Life for Dad."  No author is mentioned, just the publisher - Honor Books, Tulsa Oklahoma.
     It is filled with encouraging thoughts for dads. This one has to do with restoration. It has to do with learning lessons the hard way, needing to be brought low to be lifted up, and realizing its never too late to change.  "As long as there's breath," as the old saying goes, "there's hope."  Enjoy.

"Turn us back to You, O Lord, and we will be restored;

renew our days as of old." Lamentations 5:21

     "J. C. Penny (James Cash Penny, son of a Baptist minister and founder of the chain of stores that bear his name) worked many years to become a financial success before a crisis changed his life. "When I worked for six dollars a week at Joslin's Dry Goods Store back in Denver," he recalled, "it was my ambition to be worth one hundred thousand dollars. When I reached that goal (by 1913) I felt a certain temporary satisfaction, but it soon wore off and my sights were set on becoming worth a million dollars (a goal he achieved in 1924)."

     Penny and his wife worked hard to expand the business -- so hard that one day Mrs. Penny became ill and developed pneumonia, which claimed her life. "When she died," he said, "my world crashed about me. What had money meant to my wife? I felt mocked by life, even by God Himself."

     Several more fiery trials ensued (including the Great Depression), and soon J. C. Penny was financially ruined and in deep emotional distress. At this point, he began to acknowledge his self-centered nature and his idolatry of money, and he experienced a spiritual conversion.

     "When I was brought to humility and the knowledge of dependence on God, it was forthcoming and a light illumined my being."

     $100,000.  $1,000,000.  The death of a loved one.  Sometimes it takes tragedy, not success, to restore us to the divine image in which we were created."

     Penny's conversion surrounded the loss of all his personal wealth due to the stock market crash of 1929. When the financial setbacks took a toll on his health, he checked himself into the Battle Creek Sanitarium for treatment.

     There in the hospital's chapel he heard someone sing the hymn, "God Will Take Care of You."  He repented, turned in faith to Christ, and became a professedly "born-again" Christian.

     He lived to be 95 years old, dying in February of 1971. He was involved with the founding of the University of Miami (being on its board from 1926-1930), started a group called 40Plus which helped unemployed managers and executives, and in 1954 started the James C. Penny Foundation for charitable giving.

     It was crisis, struggle, emotional pain, and the loss of nearly everything which God used to turn his life around. As many can testify, the Lord's gifts often come in the most unusual and unexpected of packages.

Blessings on your day, Pastor Jeff

Prayer for Grace and Renewal

Greetings All,

     This week's 'thought' comes to you from one of the best selling books on prayer in recent years, entitled: "Valley of Vision - A collection of Puritan Prayers and Devotions."  It is a collection of actual Puritan prayers, and was compiled by Arthur Bennett, who served at various churches in England and taught Biblical Theology and Christian Doctrine at All Nations Christian College.
     Though some might think written prayers aren't really "prayerful," or that to be true prayer it must be spontaneous, he rightly notes: "Prayer is vocal, and may therefore on occasions be written... Too often ex tempore prayer lacks variety, order and definiteness. The reason lies partly in a neglect of due preparation. It is here that the care and scriptural thoroughness which others found necessary in their approach to God may be of help."
     Today I include two prayers. The first is a prayer for grace which I photocopied and now have taped on the inside cover of my Bible. Scribbled on it are the words: "The Eve before my trip to Bolivia. My prayer for 8/27/06."  I was about to leave for a few days to speak to a group of missionaries in Santa Cruz, even though I myself was struggling through a spiritually dry and difficult time of readjustment to stateside living after 11 years in Honduras.  If you have not gone through a spiritually dark time of struggle yourself, you may not understand this one.
     The second prayer is a prayer for renewal which I also photocopied and dated -- July 30, 2000. It was the cry of my heart at that time, though it summarizes my ongoing desire on a regular basis. Either way, I hope something in them may resonate with the state of your soul and your personal needs at this very time. (*I have taken the liberty to update some of the language.)  Enjoy.

Need of Grace

"O LORD, you know my great unfitness for service, my present deadness, my inability to do anything for your glory, my distressing coldness of heart.  

I am weak, ignorant, unprofitable, and loathe and abhor my sin.  

I am at a loss to know what you would have me to do, for I feel amazingly deserted by you,   and sense your presence so little...

Return again with showers of converting grace to a poor gospel-abusing sinner.  

Help my soul to breathe after holiness,  after a constant devotedness to you, after growth in grace more abundantly every day.

O Lord, I am lost in the pursuit of this blessedness, And am ready to sink because I fall short of my desire.

Help me hold out a little longer, until the happy hour of deliverance comes, for I cannot lift my soul to you, if you of your great goodness bring me not near.

Help me to be diffident, watchful, tender, lest I offend my blessed Friend in thought and behavior.

I confide in you and lean upon you, and need you at all times to assist and lead me.

O that all my distresses and apprehensions might prove to be but Christ's school to make me fit for greater service by teaching me the great lesson of humility.

Prayer for Renewal 

"O Savior, help me.

I am slow to learn, so prone to forget, so weak to climb; I am in the foothills when I should be on the heights.  

I am pained by my graceless heart, my prayer less days, my poverty of love, my sloth in the heavenly race, my sullied conscience, my wasted hours, my unspent opportunities...

Make it my chiefest joy to study you, meditate upon you, gaze upon you, sit like Mary at your feet, lean like John upon your breast, appeal like Peter to your love, and count like Paul all things as dung [in comparison to you].

Give me increase and progress in grace so that there may be more decision in my character, more vigor in my purposes, more elevation in my life, more fervor in my devotion, more consistency in my zeal.

As I have a position in the world, keep me from making the world my position.

May I never seek in the creature what can be found only in the Creator. 

Let not faith cease from seeking you until it vanishes into sight in your presence.

Ride forth in me, O King of kings and Lord of lords, that I may live victoriously, 

and in victory attain my end, the endless bliss of entering into the Temple who is God; 

and basking in the light of the glory that shines forth from the face of Christ; 

worship Him whose beauty will enthrall the hearts of the redeemed for all eternity."

May our faithful God stir the embers in your soul, and fan them into greater flame by the breath of His Holy Spirit's renewed presence and activity, Pastor Jeff